I am no longer silent

Today I would like to share something with you here because I am currently experiencing for myself that it is good to address issues and not let them remain hidden. And I would like to take this opportunity to draw your attention to mental violence, sexual harassment and bullying in the workplace.

In the meantime, as I'm writing this, I only have a few days left and I know I won't be there much longer. But where do I start?

I've been working on a farm in Queensland, Australia since June. And my first thoughts were: maybe it could get weird. A single 40-year-old man runs the farm. And the first thing he looked at on the application forms was my age. I wasn't here to date, I was here to work.

And I did. Day after day. It's hard physical work. But my body quickly got used to that too. And the more I started to like working in the field, the less I got used to the working atmosphere. No communication about the work process, not passing on information in order to have as much control as possible and everything that was said was wrapped up in jokes, so that I had no orientation.

What's more, it's not normal for me to receive messages from my boss on my day off or “sweet dreams” at night. But I only became really suspicious when I received a message asking if I had just driven past him and was at home. It was early evening and already dark and I had just got home. After it happened again, I realized that he was watching me. With cheap excuses and playing it down as a joke, he thought it was all good. But he crossed the line several times. I was often asked if I had a partner or if I was a lesbian when I showed no interest. Unfortunately, I was still dependent on working there. But inwardly I had been saying goodbye for some time. I had no idea what it was really like until I had the opportunity to talk to a coworker outside of work. Because even that he tried to control. For 4 months, he had been trying to prevent me from talking to coworkers. I could finally see that it wasn't just me who had a hard time going to work every day and having to listen to the absolutely misogynistic and alcohol-glorifying remarks. I can count the days on one hand when he didn't pour the first can of Burben at 10 o'clock in the morning as if it were the most normal thing in the world.

And so I started looking for a new job as quickly as possible. And I was lucky.

I had actually planned to work at the weekend. It would be worth it, there's double the hourly wage. But there was an incident that made me decide not to set my foot on that farm again. Thanks to dear people who were with me in that situation, I had the courage to quit. I no longer felt alone, I had managed to talk about it and it gave me a sense of security.

After a few encouraging conversations, I'm thinking about reporting the whole situation to the police. I'm not just thinking of myself here, but also of young female backpackers who are in a similar situation and are dependent.

I set boundaries when I finally could and was no longer dependent on the job. And now, looking back, I can see how the last few months were full of control and sexism.

And yet I can say that I'm fine. I've done everything I can to make the most of my time away from work. I've put everything I've learned so far into practice. Because I know it's about me and my health. Both physically and mentally. And I keep thinking about exactly what I show here on my website and focus on in my work. It's about taking care of yourself holistically first and foremost. With food that nourishes you in the best possible way, with movement to get all your pent-up emotions flowing and with thought patterns that accompany you every day and, in the best case, carry you.

I took the time every day - no matter how long - to go to the beach. To breathe and shake everything off, to create a different reality for myself. My own. I started a yoga routine again, had lots of contact with friends who listened to me and supported me. Writing a diary, meditating, eating healthily and walking barefoot to ground myself were the order of the day.

And so today I look back on a really good time, even if it took place under bad conditions.